You are loving him so wrong!

August 22, 2016

Hey Little Ladies,

Last month was a flashback month for me and it allowed me to look back on the past year. I underwent a lot of self-reflection, particularly, in the realm of relationships. Now, I haven't had many boyfriends but the few that I have had taught me a lot of about love. Well at least I thought so....

I used to rely on my relationships so much to learn how to love. Not to mention the many many internet articles and books from relationship experts. But, what I realized was that I was doing it WRONG!  I was loving them so WRONG! It's common amongst women to look at love as:

  • What can I get from a man?
  • How much does he spoil me?
  • How good we look together?
  • How many butterflies do I get when he smiles at me?

Sorry to burst all of our bubbles but ladies none of the above dictates nor truly explains what love is and how it should be. There is one passage that sums up everything we as women need to know about love and its 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

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Yip! It's a scripture found in the bible. But if you think about it what better place than to learn how to love from than our Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth?( See what I did there?) This scripture really shows us how to love and I suppose that's why it's always recited at so many weddings.This is even where all the internet articles and love experts get their inspiration from. Someone always told me when I want to know something go to the source and in this case the bible is the source.

After studying this scripture I vowed to stop loving wrong and look to this scripture whenever I needed some clarity, advice or inspiration on Love & Relationships. Ladies, as always I share whatever tactics and tips that I come across to make life as a woman easier and this post is no exception. I urge you ladies to use this scripture so you don't end up loving your significant other, prospect or soon to be ex wrong.

Now you know I couldn't end this post without some tips on how to stop loving him so wrong. While reading, three parts of the passage stood out to me:

  1. "always perseveres"- this means there is basically no excuse for giving up. It's truly not an option and is a weak way out if you claim to love someone. When we persevere we face difficulty and continue going.  Now if things simply do not work out then that's fine. But if you give up just because it got rough then you may need to truly think if you LOVE him.
  2. "not self-seeking"- this is so simply put until I can't stand it. Not self-seeking means it is NOT all about you. There are two people in the relationship and you have to think about him as well. You should have his concern and well-being on the same level as yours. I know this is hard for me especially after being single for so long but I assure you it is achievable.
  3. "keeps no record of wrongs"- aren't we all guilty of this? Trust me I know I am. So many times I want to bring up the past and dwell on the wrongs. But guess what, little lady? You've may have done wrong as well and I'm certain you wouldn't want him keeping record as if your relationship was some game. In this case we just have to let it go....

I never claim to be a love & relationship expert and I'm not saying what I say is the gospel but I do believe that things aren't put on my heart to share in vain. As little ladies, we too sometime have to stop and evaluate our lives and make a great effort to improve. Because love is a major part of our existence why not start here?

Signed,

The Little Lady who refuses to love him wrong.

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